Holiday Stress and Ways to Cope

Shopping and Gift Giving

1. Start shopping early! For me, I get started the week after Christmas -- literally! There are incredible bargains to be had as stores strive to reduce there inventories before the end of the year. Then throughout the year I take advantage of extreme sales and put it away until the holidays. Shopping early will reduce your stress later. You can get this task out of the way and you can avoid the crowds as well.

 2. Shop online! The benefits of shopping online are obvious. Nothing beats doing your holiday shopping in your robe and slippers while sipping some fresh-brewed coffee. You can save time, save money and save gas by shopping online. Last year I did nearly all my shopping online. What I saved in gas, time and stress more than outweighed the miniscule shipping charges. I had my shopping done in less time than it would take just to travel to and from the mall.

3. Give gift certificates! With a gift certificate or gift card you can give a great gift without the guesswork. For example, why agonize over which CD to buy your nephew when you can buy a gift certificate to a record store and let him pick out exactly what he wants? It's a win-win situation. If you are sending gifts through the mail you can save significantly on shipping. It only costs a first class stamp to send a gift certificate. That shirt your nephew's going to hate will cost you at least five bucks to send.

Parties and Get-Togethers

1. Limit how many events you plan to attend this year. Of course, you're so popular that everyone wants you to come to his or her party. Trying to squeeze them all in while planning holiday meals and shopping and working, etcetera will make the holidays more hectic than they need to be. Be choosy about which functions you truly wish to attend. “No” is a very powerful word. Use it liberally. To prevent bruising others' feelings simply inform that you are saying “no” so you can spend more time with your family. Who can argue with that?

2. Plan ahead. When hosting your own parties and get-togethers plan appropriately. Make a shopping list and stick to it. When inviting folks let them know what time your event begins AND when it ends (so you have some leverage with the thing that wouldn't leave).

Those Nagging, Begging Kids!

We love our children dearly. Oh we truly do! But sometimes their behavior around the holidays becomes atrocious. If I hear the phrase “I want…” voiced just one more time, I'm sure I'm going to lose it! Here are some strategies we use to reduce our child-induced stress:

1. “Put it on your wish list!” Our children have been raised up in a consumer-powered, advertiser-driven society. Materialism is a problem we deal with every day. With the limited time we have in our busy lives it is no wonder that we as parents often give in to our children's material wants to replace what they really need -- our attention. Our highly intelligent children know perfectly well how to use our guilt as a wedge between our hearts and our wallets. And oh do they know the perfect time to do this! Usually when we are the most stressed out and tired is when they strike with this strategy! What we've learned to do with ours when they want yet another piece of junk (which will add little meaning to their world) is to tell them to “Put it on your wish list.” This powerful phrase puts an end to those spontaneous cries for something not needed. Granted, sometimes it needs to be repeated more than once, but it is something we can use without having to get angry or emotional or stressed. Try it and see if it works. For a great book to help you reduce parenting stress (and the source of this strategy) take a look at Elzabeth Pantley's book "Kid Cooperation" available from us at Half.com. It's a bargain at $4.95.

2. To help our children focus on the meaning of the season we have a family tradition. We take money out of their savings (or their allowance) and ask them to buy a toy (something they would want for themselves) to give to another child. We then have them donate it to Toys for Tots. This helps them to focus on how good they have it and teaches them compassion for others in need.